DYESS AIR FORCE BASE, Texas -- One of the biggest adjustments to command for me was the lack of official training that I received before I took command. Command has always been something that I aspired for and has always been my goal in the Air Force. When I took command, I was completely overwhelmed by the amount of information coming my way, the lack of time I had, and the gravity of my decisions. I quickly realized that my decisions were making a difference in people’s lives, in both a positive and negative manner. The weight initially was more than I thought I could handle.
Initially, I did almost everything I could to keep things "status quo," or put off decisions that I could put on hold. This was not a good strategy for a myriad of reasons and I realized I was not helping my organization, and was not helping myself. After the initial shock wore off, I started to tackle tasks at hand that I wasn’t as comfortable making initially. I made office changes, changed schedules, and eventually handled discipline cases. (I found out from legal that I had timelines and couldn’t put these off any longer). Some were easy decisions; the offices didn’t change people’s lives. Some were good decisions, like executing our funds at the end of the fiscal year. I spent a few thousand dollars on things the unit really needed and that filled me with pride. Others were very difficult decisions, administering disciplinary actions kept me up at night and caused me a lot of stress. (It still does by the way). But at the end of the day, I realized that even though the decisions were difficult, they were also necessary and ultimately helped my unit and the Air Force.
As time went on I felt more comfortable with my decisions and realized that the world was not ending, my unit hadn’t imploded, and we continued to execute the mission with professionalism and pride. After more reflection, I realized that I had received the training that I needed. While it hadn’t come from a formal class, or a tutorial to command, it had come from 15 years as an officer. It had come from experience and from osmosis from watching good and bad commanders I had in the past. After all, I had been making decisions my entire career and I had always been comfortable with them. The problem for me was that these were big decisions and I didn’t possess the self confidence that I was up to the task. I was taking command of an aircraft maintenance squadron, and felt that as a pilot I wouldn’t be able to lead the organization effectively. My lack of confidence was standing in the way of my abilities.
The light bulb went off for me after talking to my friends and fellow commanders. Regardless of where you command, or your background -command is challenging. Nobody feels ready. My friends taking command of flying squadrons felt the same trepidation. My wife taking command of an operations support squadron felt the same way. But they were all succeeding, or had succeeded in past commands. I just needed to put trust in my leadership and realize that they had confidence in me, and realized they wouldn’t have put me in the situation if they didn’t think that I had the ability to succeed.
Now, I have messed up along the way. I am far from perfect, but I realize that I need to trust my gut. I lean on my values, the upbringing I received, and the experiences I have had along the way. I realize now that as a 37-year-old, I have a few things to say about the world around me and this job I love. As I move along, the decisions have gotten easier. The gravity seems manageable and when it doesn’t, I ask for help. I have two commanders above me, deputy commanders, and a vice commander who are more than willing to help if I need it. We are all working toward the same goal. We are all trying to do the right thing. At the end of the day we all succeed together, you will be ready, trust yourself, trust your gut, and listen to the advice of your coworkers, friends, families, and your bosses. While your command will inevitably be challenging, it will be rewarding, and you will succeed.